Frequently Asked Questions about Swinging

What exactly is Swinging?

There are basically 3 categories. Social Swinging - where couples enjoy making love amongst others without swapping. They find it an erotic adventure with their own partner, adding spice to their love life. Soft Swinging - where couples make a conscious decision and effort to have sex with other partners, but refrain from the ultimate full penetration. Full Swinging - where partners make a conscious decision to swap and go all the way. Most Hedonism parties are in practice a combination of all 3. There are some exclusivly full-swap parties and these are highlighted as such in our events programme. There is never any pressure or obligation to swap, so just decide together how far you want to go, and play as much or as little as you like! Always take condoms and practice safe sex!

Can we join on the door at a party?

Sorry, no. Our parties are held in private houses, and some clubnights at secret venues. For verification and security considerations, and to prevent free loading and persona non grata, we must have advance membership. To allow joining on the door would not be in our members interests, as our party hosts are not unpaid club secretaries and cannot process credit card payments. However, as we hold parties and club nights every weekend and some midweek, you won't have to wait long to enjoy yourself, check the events out for the next one near you. Join today and you will be confirmed in time for the next party.

Can we attend a party as guests on a trial basis?

Sorry, no. Hedonism exists for the benefit of genuine swingers and active players, NOT curious spectators! Only bona-fide members may attend parties for this reason.

We are a couple with bi-fem who only wants active attention from other bi-females.

No problem. This a normal scenario in the scene and quite acceptable practice at couples and ladies only parties. Just ask any female you fancy if she wants to join you on her own for a threesome. Some will be happy to, others may request their partner watches without joining in. There also ladies only playrooms at some venues.

What are the admission charges?

These vary considerably and are paid cash on the door direct to the party hosts or club organisers. As a general guide single ladies will pay £5 - £20, couples £20 - £40, single gents £30 - £80.

How could joining the scene affect our relationship?

If your relationship is strong AND you are on the same wavelength it can only enhance it. If however your relationship is weak, rocky or you are not BOTH up for it, DON'T!

I am a single male, Is there enough for me in the club?

Yes, there is. The scene has moved on greatly in the last decade. However, as a single gent, you cannot go to every event, so you have to make a little extra effort and book further in advance, as numbers are limited to ensure a sensible balance. We do NOT do gang-bangs! That is just prostitution in disguise, and nothing to do with swinging! Clubnights (parties in clubs) are very popular with the single ladies, who love any excuse to dress up and dance in their sexiest and kinkiest gear! So attend them, be a social animal in the RIGHT environment, and use them to meet potential partners for the house party circuit. Take full advantage of all the events you can attend, rather than bemoan the one's you can't! Remember, most couples in the scene met through conventional channels. We are NOT an escort agency, dating agency or marriage bureau! We organise the events, it is for you to attract a partner! These are the true facts! Anyone who tells you different is lying, and just desperate for your dosh! The price differentials exist to maintain an even balance of the sexes. Approx 70% Couples, 10% Ladies, 20% Gents. Admission charges for single guys vary greatly, but are generally £18-£40 for clubnights and £40-£80 for house parties. Check the Singles section under Events to confirm exactly which parties and clubnights you can attend.

What is a Party Hostess & how do I contact them?

Party Hostesses are attractive swinging female members, mostly bi-sexual in the 20 - 35 age range, who will partner single Gents to Couples & Ladies only parties and clubnights or any other scene event. Fees are negotiable direct with the hostess dependant upon the level of participation and time involved. They can be contacted by phone or email from the Hostess section of the Contacts page via the Members Login. You contact them direct, not us.

What is the difference between a Clubnight and a House Party?

Very little, other than the obvious. Clubnights are just parties held in private clubs or other non-residential establishments. In general they will have dancing, DJs, theme nights and a licensed bar. Some venues are unlicensed, so you still bring your own booze as with a house party. Many club and house party venues now have pools, Jacuzzis, saunas etc. Nominal membership, registration or I.D on the door is required at a few club venues for legal reasons. Full details of all the facilities at each venue are highlighted on our events programme.

What is the dress code for the parties?

The dress code for swing parties is smart casual for the gents and elegant, sexy, see through or fetish gear for the ladies. The dress code for fetish parties is strictly leather, rubber, latex, PVC, uniform or drag etc for both ladies and gents. The events programme will give all the details.

Are we too old/young to join?

There is no age discrimination in this scene. However 80% of our members are 23 - 48, and you MUST be over 18 to join. A few parties have a strict age profile, eg 18-35, 35-50. Most, however, are open to all.

We live outside of the UK and will be visiting London soon, is it worth joining?

Absolutely! We have events every weekend (see the upcoming programme in the Events section) and this means that wherever you are in the UK you are bound to have something on near you during your stay. The scene operates differently in the UK to many other parts of the world. Parties are held in members private homes and clubnights in private clubs. For this reason advance membership is essential. We offer membership at a discount to tourists, just £40. TOURIST RATE ONLY APPLIES TO APPLICATIONS ORGINATING FROM OUTSIDE THE UK. TOURIST MEMBERSHIP ENTITLES YOU TO 2 MONTHS MEMBERSHIP. FOREIGN NATIONALS LIVING OR WORKING IN THE UK DO NOT QUALIFY. OVERSEAS MEMBERS REQUIRING MORE THAN 2 MONTHS MEMBERSHIP MUST JOIN AT THE STANDARD UK RATE. You must join prior to arrival in the UK to qualify.

What nights are your parties and clubnights held on?

Most House Parties are held on Saturday nights, with occasional parties on a Friday or Sunday (over Bank Holidays). Clubnights and other events are held mainly at weekends, with some on weekdays, Wednesdays to Fridays, see the Events section for details.

What time do events start and finish?

Most parties or clubnights run from 9pm - 3am. Some events will start at 8pm or finish at 4am. Exact times for each event are on the events programme.

What sort of people join Hedonism?

Our membership is very wide but predominantly ABC1's who like living life to the max. Most ladies are bi-sexual and most gents heterosexual. We have noted however an increasing number of younger bi-sexual couples.

In this day and age is the scene safe?

Swingers are probably the safest group around. We are all very conscious of the importance of Safe Sex at all times.

How many members do you have?

We have over 2000 members and still rising! Approx 70% are couples 10% bi-ladies, and 20% gents.

Are there any club rules?

Yes as with any club there is always small print, thankfully however we don't believe in making it literally small.  We combine our club rules with general scene etiquette which will ensure you get the most out of the swinging scene. Most are common sense but need to be stressed. Click Here for full details

How do we renew our membership?

Your annual membership is automatically renewed at a discounted renewal rate of £45 per couple or single. You will be sent a renewal reminder by email about 2 weeks before your membership expires with the option to cancel. Tourist members will not be offered automatic renewal and must re-apply.

We are extra large, are there any size restrictions?

In common with the population at large, members come in a variety of shapes and sizes, however there are limits on acceptability. Physical appearance is important along with high standards of health and hygiene. The scene attracts the more body conscious crowd. Bulging beer bellies and obesity are unhealthy, unattractive and undesirable. Some of the smaller selective parties will insist on members falling within a certain age and size group. They may require photos as proof that you meet their profile. If you feel your size could preclude you, why not get in shape first, then join!

Do you supply condoms at parties?

Condoms are supplied at many house parties, but not all, so always take your own and play safe. Each venue will state if condoms are supplied free in the details on the events programme. Club venues will normally sell condoms through their vending machines.

I cannot have mail sent to my home, can correspondence be done via email?

All correspondence to online members is by email. You access your parties and events programme via the private Members Login on our website. A hard copy summary, suitable as a print-out, is also sent as an attachment with your membership confirmation.

Can we pay by Credit Card?

Yes, just go to our JOIN page

How do we book into Parties?

As a Hedonism member you are able to access the online events programme through our private members website, which will also be emailed or posted to you on request. To book in and receive party invites and address, just contact the party hosts direct by phone or email. All the information about each swingers party, clubnight and top scene event, is featured in detail on the events programme. Some Hedonism clubnights do not require advance bookings, so the full address and time of those events is given, and you can just turn up on the night. Swingers parties and clubnights often last until dawn, so there is rarely any need to book into hotels for the night. Your confidentiality and privacy is always respected.

What are the additional benefits in joining Hedonism?

The majority of our members are experienced swingers familiar with some venues. Others are new to the scene and relying on our reputation to ensure that all the venues are active, current and genuine, meeting the high standards required by Hedonism. There are many additional benefits to membership, which we hope you will appreciate over the coming year.

  1. The convenience of a full synopsis for each party or clubnight with dates planned and confirmed months ahead.
  2. No cowboy operators, rip-offs or seedy dives, only quality venues and events to suit every age and taste.
  3. Venues that cease to exist are promptly removed, and any dates or changes are constantly updated.
  4. New venues are added regularly, and there can be some exclusive one-off or occasional parties held by Hedonism members, who do not wish to have parties every month, and do not wish to have their own websites.
  5. Even the most reputable contact sites with directories (and there are very few!) masquerading as swingers clubs, are still featuring venues or clubs that ceased to exist years ago. They just want you to join their contact site and waste money on their chatlines and webcams etc, they have no vested interest in ensuring you have a great night out with real swingers at a genuine house party or club venue!
  6. Hedonism members are all genuine active players, and not timewasters, as they have paid to join.
  7. We have evolved into an unofficial umbrella organisation as well as a club. Most reputable party hosts and club organisers want to be featured by Hedonism, so that our members can attend their parties and events, as they cannot compete with our search rankings or active membership.
  8. A professional and personal service, where queries are dealt with promptly by real people, over the phone or by email.